THIS MOVIE IS KILLING ME….
i cant watch chick flicks. they suck. they just make you depressed even if you weren’t before.
i was fine.
trust me i was. up until now.
i don’t think it’s ever been this bad. I can’t do this.
honestly, I can’t stop thinking about him. today was the worst.
maybe it’s because yesterday we spent the entire day together & because of what is going on with his dad being in the hospital & stuff.
Idk. god, i’m being such a girl -_-
And the sucky part is, it’s not even legit cheating. Cause we’re not doing anything physical at all.
It’s like emotional. emotional cheating. Is that even possible?
god, and i think he feels the same way.
Why the hell am I being such a girl about this?!?
he keeps saying this crap about how we need to talk.
blah blah, and how he needs to tell me something.
but he never does, he never admits it.
and i don’t expect him to.
He has a girlfriend.
that’s what i keep reminding myself.
or what i have to keep reminding myself. what i should keep reminding myself.
this sucks.
i hate this,
being in this position.
the place that i’m in.
and this movie isn’t helping at all.
it’s describing my entire self.
everything i’m going through. the stupid decisions. the feelings. how much of idiot i look like.
i’m the quiet girl, who never asks anyone for anything.
always let’s the guy get away.
and the one that’s stuck in the sucky position
of liking someone & not being able to have them.
we’re both too proud, so we won’t admit it.
we’re both too scared, so we won’t take the chance.
and me? i’m not being myself.
because this girl?
the one that makes her best friend cheat on his girlfriend. and the one who falls for the idiot that plays every girl. and the one who in the back of her mind believes that guy will change for her….
that’s not me.
but there’s still something about it.
and i have no idea what to do.
